Title Unchallenged! Hot Mess 2020

The 2020 Hiroshima AJET Leaver's Party was cancelled because of a spike in COVID cases. They posted the results on their facebook page. Unsurprisingly, I won the Hot Mess Award for the second year in a row. Since I couldn't give my acceptance speech in front of my peers, I'm posting it here so you can judge & celebrate me digitally instead.

I want to dedicate this award to all the enablers. To everyone who has encouraged me to grab that extra can of lemon sour chuuhai at 2AM, cheered my name when we do kitchen body shots, or queued a Cardi B song at karaoke, I just wanna say, thanks. I'm glad you came along, partner. Thank you for late-night purikuras. For telling me when I have rice in my hair. For accepting the fact that like a parrot, I never actually learned how to human speech and can only quote vines. For every bwa bwa bwa bwaaaaaa. For not letting me nipslip on zoom. For helping me avoid being abducted by marines. For sitting down when *that* song comes on because you know I'll need to use you as a prop. For putting it on Spotify in the first place. For kissing me on the jouch (jean couch). To all of the people who've helped me on my journey to being the spectacularly disorganized spectacle of a woman I am today, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Next time Terry Folds plays over the Shack speakers, the lap dance is on me. Well, on you¹. I will be.

Mic drop, queue victory anthem.

¹ (((except Cooper. LOOK AWAY!!!)))